Pronoia #powerofpositive

In the last few weeks I have been reading about Rob Brezsny’s writings and ideas and I decided to give some of it a go. 

For those who may have not heard of it, according to my old mate ‘Google’ - “Pronoia is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings”.

No, Brezsny had said that a great idea is to get dressed up and give money to passers by and watch their reactions of wonder for you.  My pennies are very limited so that was out.  However, most of everything else he said, I did try to follow through with. 

His philosophy is mainly to let all negatives leave you, and generate positive vibes to your universe.  Don’t partake in anything that involves negativity.  When someone says something on the negative side steer it to a positive.  When you think something is going to drive you crazy, return it with praise.

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The first few days of the exercise was a little foreign because you literally need pull yourself back, keep yourself in check, in the most amazing situations in which you normally may have had a short fuse.  Standing in queues at the supermarket, waiting on the phone for assistance, texting and speaking with your friends and partner are just a few that come to mind. 

He, Rob Brezsny, (astrologer, author poet and musician) suggests you take it slowly.  Pick a few of the closest to start your ‘new you’.

So my adventure began.  I scoured any text, email or written word  that I  was going to send and exchanged anything that had a ‘no’, ‘not, ‘bad’ etc to a positive form.  At the end of each message I would add ‘blessing’, ‘cheers’ and the like. Not even, did I use ‘goodbye’ or anything that may be seen as final and leave the reader stagnant after reading my notes. 

Now it was funny to see the responses from my best friend, my partner and anyone as close. It was also a little difficult as my best friend has experienced many texts etc from me over the years and she knows that whenever I end a text, a message or an email to her with cheers, she knows that I am being quite sarcastic and it works a treat to make her focus on her wrong doings oooops he he. If it makes touch down, as a rule I am excited, but this now had to be positive, and ‘cheers’ to her would be a negative, so I had to change that for her. 

My partner limits his trips to Chinatown so as to not oversaturate me with MSG etc oops but now I was instigating for us to take trips to Chinatown regularly, to eat what he wanted to eat, and more often.  Seriously, we frequented it so much I was thinking my blonde hair would turn raven from over indulgence.  Now that would be a negative, so I made myself believe that if it happens all would be great in the sunshine state.  I also started googling words, and how to say them in Mandarin, to impress him more often.  Now that is a challenge when you are Anglo and he is deaf.  However, he showered me with praise and was telling people that I am half Chinese now and he is so proud of me.  (Inflated ego or what?)

Because of his deafness, he quite often does not hear at what force he puts things down. He chips, breaks and slams things quite often.  So to turn my negatives, with each thing he broke, I convinced myself that they are replaceable (that cup, that plate was not a Ming vase after all). Again he praised me for not getting upset over his breaking of my heirloom piece.  My bestie was and still is convinced that I had turned to some religious cult and had changed.  I am not sure how many times she referred to me as the Bishop or she would question my sincerity as if I was being sarcastic.  (Now we know I would never do that on this mission of the world blessing me continually, and conspiring to shower blessing back at me.)

Probably my most difficult times were in the shops! Instead of giving people money, I would insist that they should go ahead of me at the checkout. When anyone barged in front of me, I would say,'You deserve to be in front. Have a nice day.'  When waiting on the phone and hearing the music, I would count my blessings that I could hear all of this, start whistling, etcetera. When the person came back on the phone and said, 'Sorry for keeping you waiting', I would say,'No it was great, I got to catch up on some book work.' Or, 'No that was great, my whole house is clean now that I have waited, thank you.'

Ok, now my trial period is over, I will indeed look more at what I say, and do, to make life more positive.  Don’t get too excited when you see me at the checkout however, I won’t be letting you into the queue. It was an eyeopener in many ways as to how we go about our normal days on a quite often unknowingly, negative bent. So I am going to look more closely at how I communicate.  (Just remember Blondie, when I say ‘cheers’ in the future its not a blessing it is ‘move it or lose it.’) 

One thing I did notice regarding the Pronoia condition is that people genuinely are nicer to you and thank you more often. One thing noticeable, is that your messaging becomes shorter as you don’t have a negative thing to say and the RSI of my texting thumb is quite relieved as well. 

Anyway, I conclude it is a lot nicer to be nice.  It is a lot nicer not think that the bank is ripping you off for your money and that they are there to ‘serve’ you.  (After all the world is conspiring to shower me with blessing and the banks are in this world. Therefore soon, they will be handing out the money.)

To Rob Brezsney I thank you for showing me a new way to look at things.  It has been great. 

 As to my readers I urge you to try it and you too may see things in a different light. Until then cheers (not you Blondie) and blessings to all.  

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Happy Birthday Charles!! #HRH #republic

Yesterday, we said farewell to the royal couple, Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall, and what an exciting event that was - for him to share his birthday on November 14th with all of us.  I do hope he enjoyed his holiday here in our fair country.  It is fitting that we furnish him with the comforts of home while he is here. Clickerty click, sixty six, was such a special occasion for him to spend time here and to be welcomed  by our Prime Minister.  No doubt, Mr.Turnbull would have enjoyed reminding him of the republican debate?  He may have also tossed back a champagne with someone he is pleased to have as the Prince’s life partner.  Maybe, he filled the Cottesloe Cup for Camilla to toast her husband’s health and pray for his longevity to take to the throne.

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I am sure that most people, along with me, believe that a holiday was only fitting for such an important man and his wife. I am also sure that most of us do not mind paying for his trip, while our home loan interest rates soar or, is that make us sore. 

I am also sure that our drought stricken farmers watched on with amazement as the young prince stepped from the plane to be greeted by liquid sunshine.  I am sure ‘the farmers’  took time out to view the spectacle before returning to hand feed their dying cattle and walk the parched land they call home, a lucky country indeed that is 80% in drought. 

I believe that the 13.9% of the population, that equates to 2.5 million Australian people living  below the international poverty line, watched on with excitement when Camilla learned to prepare truffles for her husband when she returns home.  She will be a very ‘sage’ woman when it comes to the kitchen, a great asset for the house of Windsor .

I do hope that Charles and Camilla have appreciated our generosity.  It’s not often that we throw money to people so deserving.  And to think they didn't need to beg for it either!!  They have truly taken on the Australian persona - stiff up a lip, take it on the chin, she’ll be right mate and so on.

On a serious note, my mind boggles as to how such a devout environmentalist can see our Australian dollars flow by the hundreds of thousands for few day visit.  God knows we could have imported Evian water by the container load and supplied it to our farmers for their dying cattle.  The amount spent on their board and lodgings could go to supply one meal a day for the less fortunate and the less fortunate would not need to learn of the do’s and don’ts of truffle preparation - just one more meal that support organizations aren't stretching their already increasing budgets for. 

The budget spent on their security is yet another expense we need not have.  Surely the money wasted on that alone would strengthen the security of our own people especially thinking of the black Friday in Paris. 

Yes, we are the lucky country but for how long can we be lucky? Throwing our money to people who could easily afford to book a Qantas flight, book a room through Airbnb, hire a Budget mini bus for themselves and a few staffers and enjoy the real world for a change.  God knows, maybe they could book a dining room at the local RSL and shout the GG and a few friends to a dinner and throw a few dollars for Brendan Nelson to buy a some poppies for the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month, while Charles and Camilla straddle the bar and talk to the normal returned servicemen and women. 

Yes, it is nice that we as Australians are seen as a very hospitable and giving nation, but when are these people going to throw their doors open and welcome us to their homes.  When are Charles and Camilla going to open their doors to us and say, ‘Don’t bring your purse, it’s on us!’

Not for one minute am I saying I don’t like these people and that their role is not important but, I am saying when will we stop throwing money at people who are not in need?

I welcome Charles and Camilla to Australia. But, when I visit your fair country, I pay the flight, I pay the accomodations, I pay to see Windsor Castle and God knows I pay to visit Westminster Abbey to see a few relics and pray.  However, when you visit our country we still pay to see the relics .

Happy Birthday again Charles and may your life be long,  (with your genes you are going to need it) and may one day we see you here as King.

Until for next time I’m in London, my birthday is January 22nd and, I am quite partial to a view of Regency Park and a glass or two of Champagne.

Cheers

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Labels #lgbtiq #queer

As a long serving, long suffering gay guy, I wonder why our search for equality has come to labeling.  As far back as I can remember we have sought equality.  As far as I can remember we have just wanted two guys who love each other, are attracted to each other to be seen as normal.  The same too, I can imagine, is what our gay sisters and transgender and bi family have aspired to achieve as well.

 

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I may be wrong but, I have only wanted my love for another man to be seen as normal as that of our straight brothers and sisters.  Why then have we, after most of the world has begun to embrace our equality of sexuality, started to label ourselves more often than not?  Why can't we be Mr and Mr and end of story?

It makes me wonder whether we, being loud and proud of who we are, want to be seen as normal people of which we have sought equality?  Do we, in fact, need to label ourselves with LGBTIQ etc etc ad nauseam?  Do straight people have to add SP so we know which camp (so to speak) they favour? 

If someone believes in our equality, do they need to label themselves as GF = Gay Friendly?  Or, in fact do we as gay guys need to add more letters to our label if we have straight friends = SF?  The plot thickens, as do the initials to our existence.  Or in fact in my partner and my relationship, do we add “M’ for monogamous or if otherwise be OR = Open relationship or in the case of our straight brethren PTF = Playing the field.  

Yes, it is nice to see that we have come this far but why have we not added, S for straight, in front of our initials if we are in fact equal?  After all, they are who we are trying to be equal to.  And when all churches embrace our sexual orientation, do we add GA = God accepted?  Having said this, our initials will be longer than the song in Mary Poppins.  ‘supercalawhatever’ God help me I can’t spell that, let alone putting our labels to paper. 

Yes, I understand we want to be recognized as people who have been seen as different in the past.  But, do we always want to be seen as people of a different bent to mainstream.  If so yes, continue putting labels to our names but, if not, I want to be seen with no label but my name and that is the finish. Once we are fully accepted as normal human beings, I would like labels to be the thing of the past - not a past that we cannot shed because we love labels. 

If however, we are waiting for all to be embraced in normal society, and we want to stand in union with our fellow non-normal friends, why do we not just adopt the title ‘different’ until we all are one? This would seem to me to be a more acceptable title.  I say this because by using the LGBTIQ etc etc title we are not only separated by our sexuality but within our sexuality and how we use it. 

For all we have been through over the centuries in our quest for recognition to be normal, is it not also important to achieve no labeling of any kind?

Yes labels are well established in our society. But let’s just allow them to pertain to our grocery stores, our designer clothes and our cars and anything that gives us more prestige.  Labeling people does not give us prestige, it gives us a class distinction which has been the very thing that we have fought against throughout the ages. 

These are my thoughts!  

 

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Princess of Change #frailty #strength #inspiration

Sitting drinking my morning coffee, I was remembering the strengths and weaknesses of someone dear to me who had passed recently.  I then started to think of what I have brought to the table of life to this point, and I don’t mean money.  Money is easily spent (especially in my case he he) but I mean qualities of love, of caring, of nurturing, of setting examples of compassion and understanding of others needs.  And, strangely enough being open to show my weaknesses, and my attempts to improve myself so those around me may learn and be encouraged to share themselves at the banquet table of life. 

Those who know me, will know that music is of great comfort to me and, as I scrolled my way through You Tube I came upon the 2007 concert for Princess of Wales that the two Princes were instrumental in organizing.

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I looked on the opening photos of the late Princess and wondered how the years had passed since the people’s Princess had emerged into our lives in that sun filtered sheer fabric skirt and then, passed as quickly those short  years later in the tunnel in Paris.

As the opening song is sung, I think of how in awe I am of her strengths, but also feel I am indebted to her for her weaknesses.  Because, through both weakness and strength we the Princess's people have  learned many lessons.  Lessons that encourage us to look beyond ourselves and realise that we are not alone. 

Her charities for the care of children, have brought us to think of the children, and families, that are suffering and to give them hope, and encouragement, in their times of crisis. She worked for the homeless and showed us that we need to think and help those less fortunate than ourselves.  With her patronage to the landmines, I believe she was instrumental in the establishment of the Ottawa Treaty.  Her work for disabled people has showcased our need to support, and encourage, those that in a bygone era would have been institutionalized. 

Her work and support of those with HIV/AIDS helped to expel the thoughts of mindless people believing that HIV was merely a gay plague.  She showed the world that indeed this disease was one that infected and affected men, women and children and not just a minority. 

As for her weaknesses, they enlightened us that her/their very public divorce was not one that was simply swept under the carpet.  It showed isolation. It showed humiliation. It showed children of divorce and how it affects all who are concerned.  It showed the church's involvement. It showed the perception of others on those who become divorced and, sadly, that all divorces bring out allegiances to either party involved that become hurtful and, the very structure of family changes forever despite where, or what, family we come from.

Her publicized, and probably quite often exaggerated, outbursts in regard to her ex-family and his choices, opened our minds to the fact that depression is not just for the common man or woman.  Depression is real and can happen to anyone, anywhere, from cradle to the tomb. It showed that it happens in every walk of life and that this disease is not to be frowned upon. We must encourage people suffering to seek help and, those that see it in others should offer support, and let them know they are not alone with their sickness. 

The fashion industry gained momentum in her life but, it also showed that with glamour there can also be pain. Since her passing, we have seen the awareness that bulimia and anorexia has had on men and women and even children. In this too, she has lead us to open our hearts, our eyes, and our minds as well. 

As the closing credits of this tribute to a beautiful, strong, yet sometimes fragile lady roll down my screen, I thank her for sending to not only me, but to many who have seen her rise and pass us by to a better place, messages of hope of inspiration, and awareness, for our fellow man/woman and child. 

Our footprints to life’s banquet table may not be as pronounced as hers but, it gives us encouragement to leave something to those we finally leave behind.  Something that is enough to etch a lesson of life, that may kindle a fire in others, and indeed leave a memory that our life was not in vain. 

Princess Diana, your life may have become a flicker to some maybe, but if we think beyond and what we have learned from your life here among us, we may join all our flickers and become a beacon to the world.

Peace and love to all.

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